David J. Pollay's Blog

Don’t Settle. Do What You Love.

Don’t settle.  Be grateful.  But don’t settle in life. 

Last week I asked you two questions:

Are you doing what you love?

Are you getting good at what you love?

Let’s pick up where we left off.  Our goal is to answer, “yes…yes.”

If you answered, “no…no,” focus this week on exploring what you love to do.  Think about the “activities” you’ve loved in the past.  What were the things you were doing?  What actions were you taking?  Be specific.  Describe them.  Then find at least one opportunity to engage in one of those activities at work or at home.  Be curious and creative.  You’ll find an opportunity.  I guarantee it if you look hard enough.  Once we find out what you love to do, we’ll then focus on building your expertise next.

If you answered, “no (not at work)…yes,” what one thing can you do to help craft your job in a way that will allow you to do more of what you love?  Be creative.  Don’t give up.  There is always something you can do.

If you answered, “yes…no,” what is the one thing you can do this week to build your expertise or experience?  Don’t put it off.  Choose one thing now.  You’ll feel good when you do.

If you answered, “yes…yes,” pause and say thanks.  You’re on an important path to happiness and success.  Connect to the powerful positive emotion of gratitude.  My practice is to stop, look up, and say everything I’m grateful for (I also start every day that way). 

Remember to be grateful for what you have, but don’t settle in life. 

Let me know how it goes this week.  Post a comment or send me an email. 

Together, we’re pursuing a strategy that has helped me achieve every significant goal in my life.  I want to help you do more of what you love.  And I want you to get really good at what you love doing.

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

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And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

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David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out next year.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.thelawofthegarbagetruck.com.

David holds a master’s degree of applied positive psychology (M.A.P.P.) from the University of Pennsylvania, and a bachelor's degree in economics from Yale University.

Two Questions for You this Week

Monday Morning Momentum™

I have a request.  I want you to think about two questions this week.

Are you doing what you love?  Are you getting good at what you love? 

I believe these questions are the key to your success and happiness.  I know that positive psychology research confirms this belief. 

The challenge is that many people are telling us to “follow the money.”  People are telling us what we should study and what we should do with our careers to make it in this economy. 

While it’s essential that you know how to make money for you and your family, it’s just as important to understand “you.”  What matters to you?  What makes your life worth living? 

For years in my seminars, I have been teaching people how to pursue a strategy focused on getting good at what you love to do.  I have seen this approach work for thousands of people.

This week I want you to focus on your own answers to these questions.

Are you doing what you love?

Are you getting really good at what you love?

Take a walk, grab a cup of coffee, or turn on some music and think about your answers.

My mission in life is to help people find a way to answer yes to these questions.  We’ll talk more next week.

Best to you,

David 

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out later this year.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.thelawofthegarbagetruck.com.

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio. 

You can sign up for David’s MO Minutes Newsletter here.

 

Talking to Yourself Can Make You Happier

Monday Morning Momentum                                          

My four-year old daughter and I were walking through a nature preserve last year when she stopped, turned around, and looked right up at me and said, “Papi, what did you say?” 

I said, “Ah, nothing sweetie.” 

“But Papi, I heard you say something.”

“Oh, Eliana, I must have been talking to myself.”

And then she asked me the big question, “Papi, why were you talking to yourself?”

Why was I talking to myself?  That was a great question.  I didn’t know.  I didn’t even know that I was doing it!

While you might be smiling right now, you know you do it too.  We all do it.  If you don’t believe me, try this quick exercise.

Take a quick break and email me what you have read so far in this column.  You can reach me at [email protected].  Okay? 

Stop!  Now what are you saying to yourself?  “Why is he asking me to do this?  I don’t have time right now.  I don’t do exercises.  I’m not emailing a columnist.”  That’s all self-talk.  As I said, we all do it.  Everybody does. 

And we talk fast.  We speak out loud at approximately 200 words per minute.  Yet we speak to ourselves at more than 1,300 words per minute.  At this rate we might have over 45,000 thoughts per day.  The problem is that many of these thoughts aren’t helpful.

What does this mean for us?  Roy Baumeister, a leading Psychology researcher from Florida State University, has found in his research that people remember bad events more often than good events.  So if we are more likely to remember the bad stuff, and we talk to ourselves at an incredible speed, how much of what we say to ourselves helps us live a better life?  Are we more successful, and are we happier?

15 years ago my grandfather taught me that the answer can be “yes” if we choose what to say to ourselves. 

I was visiting my grandfather in his home in Augusta, Maine.  We called him Bumpa.  He was 86.  Bumpa was having a rough morning; he was not feeling well.  He had a right to feel bad; he was a survivor of three major strokes.  

That morning I walked down the short hallway from the guest bedroom to the kitchen.  I stopped when I heard his voice.  I slowly peeked around the corner and I saw him sitting in his rocking chair.  He was staring at his legs as he was saying, “Legs don’t fail me now.  You can do it.  You’ve always been strong.  I have a lot to do.  Let’s go legs.  I’m getting up.”

Thirty minutes later Bumpa was outside in his backyard chopping wood.  Here was a man the doctors thought we had lost three times.  He lived to be 90 years old.

My grandfather taught me the power of self-talk. 

I’m at my best when I think about all the support I have, the strengths I have been given, the successes I’ve had, and the goals I have now.  I’m at my best when I choose what to think about.

And it was my four-year old daughter’s question that reminded me to choose the self-talk that will help me to live my best possible life.  Eliana also helped me remember how much I loved and admired my grandfather. 

 

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out later this year.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.thelawofthegarbagetruck.com.

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio. 

You can sign up for David’s MO Minutes Newsletter here.

Good Problems to Have

Monday Morning Momentum™ 

From the time I entered kindergarten until my sophomore year in college I played football.  It was my passion.  And to get bigger and stronger, I began to lift weights the summer before my freshman year in high school.  Over the next six years I worked out regularly.  And I worked out hard.  I put on muscle and I gained strength, and it came as a result of thousands of hours of training.  It was not easy, but it was worth it. 

Too big?

One thing that always made me laugh during my training years was when someone who was not exercising regularly would tell me:  “I don’t life weights because I don’t want to get too big.”  I would just smile whenever someone said that to me.  They had no idea that the problem they envisioned would not happen overnight.  In fact, it would take more time and effort than they could ever have imagined.  There may be other reasons not to lift weights, but “getting too big” is not one of the realistic ones.  “Getting too big” is what I call a “good problem to have.”  Your journey to bigness would involve regularly going to the gym, eating right, sleeping well and getting healthy.  And if your muscles really did start popping out of your gym clothes, you could use the mirror to guide you on how much you needed to ease up on the weights.

Good problems

There are problems we definitely don’t want, and there are problems that are good to have.  We just need to look at the good problems differently.

Too in-demand?

I love being with my wife, Dawn, and my little girls, Eliana and Ariela.  You can guess that I prefer not to travel more than I have to for business.  So, I catch myself saying, “I don’t want to be a ‘road warrior’ who measures his success by the number of speaking engagements he has all over the country.  I don’t want to be speaking all the time.”  What is this?  It’s a “good problem to have.”  What’s a better way to look at it?  I want my writing and speaking to be so much in demand that I can choose which of all those available speaking dates I want to accept and which ones I can say no to (even though I am grateful for all the opportunities).

Too much money?

And here’s one I hear a lot of people saying:  “I don’t want to make a lot of money if it means sacrificing the good things in my life.”  What is this?  Yes, it’s another good problem to have.  Here’s another way to look at it:  I want to be so good at what I love doing that people will pay me handsomely to do it.  I’ll then continue to do what I love, and I’ll have all the time I want to spend with family and friends.

Your good problems

Now, what do you say negatively about the things that could possibly make your life even more wonderful?  What are your good problems to have?  How could you change your view of them?  Consider re-orienting your imagination from the downside of success to the upside of opportunity.  Another approach to the same issue could produce an eventual breakthrough for you.

Remember

Some problems are good to have.

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out later this year.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.thelawofthegarbagetruck.com.

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio. 

You can sign up for David’s MO Minutes Newsletter here.

Your 7 Step LIFE Calling Plan™

Monday Morning Momentum™

Are we doing as much as we can with the life we have been given?  Are we using our natural given talents to a good end?  Are we making a difference with our work?  Is this what we were meant to do with our lives?  Or directly said, “What’s the point?  Why are we here?”  

These questions have been asked for thousands of years.  The way the question is phrased varies, but the meaning is the same.  Our quest is universal.  

Knowing our purpose, or our calling, and living it, increases our happiness.  Yale psychology researcher Amy Wresniewski and others have also discovered in their research that living our calling leads to superior work performance and career success.  

Some of us, throughout our lives, have actively sought the answer to the question, “What is our calling?”  We have thought about it for as long as we can remember.  Others have pondered this question less often.  But, when we experience disruptions in our lives, we all ask the question.

Today’s global economic crisis is that disruption.  It is causing us to reflect.  When we lose our jobs, or our salaries are cut or frozen, or our work roles are significantly changed, the question of what we are doing with our lives becomes more urgent.  

If you are at or near this defining moment, you are looking at one of the most important opportunities of your life.  The question then becomes, “What do you do next?”  You can follow my “7 Step LIFE Calling Plan™” to get started. 

(1) Write down the things you have frequently dreamed of doing with your life if given the chance.  Write down which of those interests have inspired you the most and would give you the greatest satisfaction if you pursued them.  

(2) Write down the expenses you must absolutely maintain in your life, and which ones could be reduced or eliminated.  Be creative.  You want as much financial room as possible to maneuver into your new, more meaningful, but potentially less lucrative path (at least in the short term)?

(3) Write down the additional expenses you would likely incur on your new path.  Do you need additional education, training, or coaching to pursue your calling?

(4) Write down five to ten of the most successful people in your domain of interest.  Buy their books, listen to their CDs, read their articles, follow their blogs…do anything to learn from them.

(5) Write down everyone you know who does anything related to your interest.  Write down when you will contact them to learn more about what they do, and what advice they could give you.  

(6) Pick up your calendar, and choose four days when you can be alone or with a loved one.  Break from your normal routine and environment.  You can stay in a hotel, motel, hostel, or the home of a friend or family member.  Use this time to fully explore what your life would be like if you pursued your dream.  How could you make it work?  What would you have to do?  

Take the time to sketch out an ambitious plan.  Then make sure to draw out a similarly bold timeline, but infuse it with realism.  You must consider the commitments you have, and the ones you will need to modify – or give up – in order to determine what you can do, when, and how quickly.  

(7) Finally, when you return from your time away, write down the reasons you are excited that you are pursing your passion.  And then, start each day offering thanks for the freedom you have to choose what you do every day.  Immerse yourself in the vision of your best possible life.  

The time to act is now.  You are on a mission; you have accepted the challenge of your calling.  You will not get there overnight, but you will make it happen.  Nineteenth century British Prime Minister, Benjamin Disraeli, said it best:  “The secret of success is constancy of purpose.”

 

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out later this year.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.thelawofthegarbagetruck.com.

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio. 

 You can sign up for David’s MO Minutes Newsletter here.

 

Focus + Humility + Questions = Momentum

Monday Morning Momentum™

Let me check something out with you.  Pretend for a moment that your friend, child, spouse, employee, or your boss said to you: “I would like to learn from you.  It would mean a lot to me if you would help me.”  How would you feel?  My bet is that you would feel great:  We all like to believe that we have something to offer the people we care about.

People want to help us when we are humble enough to ask for help.

We demonstrate our curiosity when we seek assistance.  We telegraph to the world that we are on a search for new ways to do, see, and experience things.  Psychologist Todd Kashdan of George Mason University wrote a chapter about the character strength of curiosity in Martin Seligman and Christopher Peterson’s book Character Strengths and Virtues.  In it Kashdan reviewed research that showed when people demonstrate curiosity, they learn more, are more engaged at work, and perform better academically.  Curiosity leads to better performance.

So, this month, let’s ask for help.  Here’s our plan:

(1)    Think of two important areas in your life in which you could use some ideas, help, or input.

(2)    Write down a few questions you could ask people about these two critical areas.

(3)    Then identify three people you could approach to ask your questions.  Choose a friend, a family member, and a colleague.

(4)    Finally, ask your questions.  But first tell them why you appreciate them (i.e., their perspective, ideas, expertise, or their knowledge of you), and ask them if they would be willing to share their thoughts with you about something important to you.  When they say “yes” – and they always will – then pose your questions to them.

(5)    Listen with humility.  Write down their answers.  And thank them for their insights and their time.

What will happen? 

First, you will be amazed at how much people will appreciate your reaching out to them:  You will have shown respect and interest in them, and for that they will be grateful – even if they do not express it immediately.  You will have deepened your relationship with them. 

Second, you will be happy to have received help from people you care about and admire.  And very importantly, you will have learned something valuable about an area of your life that matters deeply to you. 

Your focus on what’s important to you, plus your humility, plus your questions will lead to increased momentum in your life. 

Have a great month, and let me know how it goes!

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out this summer.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.bewareofgarbagetrucks.com.

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio. 

You can sign up for David’s MO Minutes Newsletter here.

 

Look for Treasure. Your Key to Success.

Monday Morning Momentum™

When I was growing up in Milwaukee, the largest electronics superstore in the area was a company called American TV.  And the owner, Len Mattioli, was famous in Wisconsin.  He was known as “Crazy TV Lenny” and he was constantly pitching his store on radio and television.  He was always yelling in his ads:  “Buy a washer, get a bike!  Buy a TV, get a bike!”  He hawked his products at full volume.

Dad’s view

One day I said to my father, “Dad this guy is nuts.  He’s always yelling!”  And my father said to me, “David, he’s a good businessman.”

My dad was right:  Dad could see American TV’s business growing quickly.  Mattioli did more than yell.  Crazy TV Lenny found a way to draw people into his business.  In fact, Mattioli took the original store and turned it into a chain of fifteen electronics superstores in the Midwest.

Bill’s view

I met Bill Zito when I was in high school, the summer before we both left Milwaukee for Yale University.  One day we were sitting in the upper grandstand at the old County Stadium watching the Milwaukee Brewers play.  I was asking him about all the players.  Bill knew them:  He had been the Brewers’ official batboy. 

So, I asked him: “What’s Cecil Cooper like?” 

Bill said:  “Excellent guy.”

“How about Paul Molitor?”

“Excellent guy.”

“And what about Robin Yount?”

“Super-excellent guy.”

And this is how the conversation went as I talked to Bill about half the roster.  I was surprised that everyone was an “excellent” guy.  We have all heard so much in the news about professional ballplayers; I thought at least someone would not be so great.  But in Bill’s eyes, everyone I asked about was an excellent or a super-excellent guy.  Bill knew something about talent:  He is now a sports agent with forty professional hockey players on his roster.

Preston's View

Twenty years ago in New York City I was with my good friend Preston Kevin Lewis.  We were looking for music in a record store when a song began to play.  I leaned over the record bin and said, “I don’t like this music.”  And Preston quietly said, “It doesn’t do a lot for me,” and kept looking through the stack of records.  While the song I pointed out wasn’t his favorite, Preston didn't spend any time focusing on the music he didn't like; instead he searched for the music he did like.

Preston is now a Managing Director for Warner Brothers Consumer Products in Australia and New Zealand, after stints with HBO Home Video, MTV, and Disney.

A lesson learned:  Find the treasures

I remember these stories because they are woven together in a lesson that has stuck with me over the past two decades:  When you look for the good, and when you expect the good, you find the good.  When you want to learn something new, there’s a treasure to be found. 

I learned that it’s easy to be a critic.  You can find fault with anything.  The challenge is to sift through life looking for brilliance, opportunities, and lessons to be learned. 

This week

So, this week observe yourself assessing the day-to-day events of your life, and the people you encounter.  What do you say to yourself about them?  What do you say to others? 

Then, here’s the big question.  When you make these comments publicly or privately, ask yourself:  “What am I learning right now?”  Do my comments and observations help me understand why someone is successful, why a business grows, and how a product sells?”

You will likely discover that your quick criticisms seldom lead you anywhere; they close the doors of your curiosity and creativity.  Your life will remain as it is.

But when you tune your mind to look for the hidden treasures in life, you will discover lessons that you can apply to your own goals and dreams.  You will advance your life.

Be a treasure hunter in life; the rewards are great.

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, The Law of the Garbage Truck™, is due out this summer.  You can find out about the No Garbage Trucks! mission at www.bewareofgarbagetrucks.com.

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio. 

 

You can sign up for David’s MO Minutes Newsletter here.

The “Five Fs” of Customer Care

Monday Morning Momentum™

Do you know the values of your organization?  Can you articulate them?  Are they memorable? 

When I joined Yahoo! in 1998 as Yahoo!’s first director of Customer Care, I realized the importance of being able to answer “yes” to these three questions.  Why?  The values we hold drive the decisions we make.

Yahoo! had 50 million customers when I started.  Thousands more were joining every day.  We were launching new products, services, and features every week.  Yet we had only a handful of employees dedicated to customer service and almost no customer support infrastructure.  We had a lot to do in a short period of time.  The question was where to begin. 

For us it began with deciding what was most important to us:  What were our values?  If we could be clear on what we stood for, all the required staffing, training, technology, and service program decisions would be made easier.  Our strategies and tactics would be grounded in the type of organization we were committed to building. 

So we launched “The Five Fs” of Customer Care.  As you can guess, the “Five Fs” were five words that all started with the letter “F.”  We wanted them to be memorable.  We wanted everyone to know them.  Here they are:

"Friendly, Fast, Focused, Fired-Up, and Fun!" 

Our Five F message was always the same:  

(1) We were “friendly” to our customers, to each other, and to everyone else at Yahoo!.  People wanted to work with us. 

(2) We were “fast” at resolving customer problems and internal issues.  Our team was quick, and so was our email and phone support technology. 

(3) We were “focused” on our priorities.  Our goals, plans, and reports kept us on track. 

(4) We were “fired up.”  We had plenty of energy to give our best every day.  We’d work all night if we needed to meet a challenge. 

(5) We were “fun!”  People enjoyed working with us.  We worked and played together.  We had a recreation team to plan team events.  We kept our work environment enjoyable.

And then we had our “Bonus F”:  “Flexible.”  We made sure everyone knew that we were capable of responding to whatever Yahoo! needed us to do.  We welcomed the opportunity to support new products and services.

Huston Smith, author of The Religions of Man, discusses the challenge of developing a “deliberate tradition” of values in any society.  “A people must first decide what values are important to their collective well-being,” wrote Smith.  “Then every device of education, formal and informal, should be turned to seeing that these values are internalized as far as possible by everyone.”

Everyone we interviewed learned The Five Fs.  Every time we gave a tour we explained The Five Fs.  When we spoke during Yahoo!’s new-hire orientation program, we presented The Five Fs. 

Bill George, former CEO of Medtronic, talks about the importance of having clearly understood values in an organization.  In his book, Authentic Leadership, George wrote:  “Values have to be discussed at every opportunity, constantly reinforced, and consistently reflected in the actions of management at all levels.” 

Our Five Fs were a guide for what we said and did.  Of course there were plenty of days when we did not meet our own expectations, but our focus on our Five F values made sure our backsliding didn’t last long.  Our Five Fs were our identity.  We were committed to living them.

How about your organization?  What values are driving your business? 

 

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, Beware of Garbage Trucks!™, is due out this summer. 

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio.

 

My Mom, the Opera Singer

Monday Morning Momentum™

(Happy Mother’s Day to all our moms!  Thank you for making us and our children possible!  I’m posting this column in honor of my mom.  Love, David)

Mom was an opera singer who could sing high C’s beautifully.  And she had the chance to sing them often.  Mom was a leading soprano with The National Opera Company, and with The Community Concert Series of Columbia Artists after her undergraduate and graduate studies at the New England Conservatory of Music.  Her repertoire included Verdi, Puccini, Mozart, Gounod, Massenet, Hayden, and Handel.  Mom also toured Europe for the State Department to entertain our troops.  And in 1956 she was presented with a certificate of esteem signed by the United States Secretary of Defense, C.E. Wilson, “…for patriotic service in providing entertainment to members of the armed forces in Europe."

I asked Mom recently how she was able to consistently sing a high C.  She said, “You already have to believe it’s there.  And once you believe it is, you have to find a way to let all negative thoughts go so that you can sing your high C.”

Daniel J. Wakin wrote about the high C last year in his article, “The Note that Makes Us Weep.”  Wakin quotes Craig Rutenberg, The Metropolitan Opera’s director of musical administration, “It is the absolute summit of technique.  More than anywhere else in your voice, you have to know what you’re doing.  To me it signals a self-confidence in the singer that lets him communicate to us that he knows what he’s doing and he has something very important to express with that note.” 

When I was growing up in Milwaukee, my parents formed their own singing act, The Pollays.  They performed across the United States and Canada with stars like Joey Bishop, Shecky Green, Myron Cohen, Mark Russell, Morey Amsterdam, Rich Little, and David Brenner.  My brother and I often had the opportunity to travel with them. 

I remember one particular performance.  Mom had the flu.  And just minutes before being introduced on stage, Mom was throwing up in the bathroom. 

I asked Mom how she was able to sing that day.  She said, “I always had a belief that I could sing under almost any circumstances.  No matter how sick I was, if I could stand up, then I could sing.”  Mom continued, “You believe you can do it.  You practice every day.  You know you have the technique.  You just have to concentrate and believe it is in you.”  And not only did she make it through the show, Mom and Dad received a standing ovation.

In a chapter on self-efficacy beliefs for the Handbook of Positive Psychology, James Maddux, professor of Psychology at George Mason University wrote, “The truth is that believing that you can accomplish what you want to accomplish is one of the most important ingredients – perhaps the most important ingredient – in the recipe for success.” 

How did a girl from Augusta, Maine become an opera singer? 

Mom said, “My belief was that I could sing and that everyone wanted to hear me sing from the time I was three years old.  My mother used to say that I woke up singing with the birds before anyone else in the family was up…and I sang all day.” 

“There was always singing in my home,” said Mom.  “On Sunday nights we listened to the Firestone Hour.  We heard opera, operetta, and other beautiful music.  I dreamed and I believed that I could sing as well as the stars could and that some day I would sing opera and be well-known.  I bought sheet music and imitated all those famous singers, and the singers in the movies.” 

Mom turned her talent and her interest into a successful singing career that spanned five decades and took her around the world.  Mom’s beliefs gave her the drive and courage to accomplish something very few people do.  She became a professional singer.  She sang opera.  And she could sing the high C’s.

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

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And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

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David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, Beware of Garbage Trucks!™, is due out this summer. 

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio.

 

Your Success and Rocket Science

Monday Morning Momentum™

If we watch commercials on television, listen to promotions on the radio, flip through magazine ads, and read marketing emails, we are constantly told that we’re missing out:  we could be making lots of money by working only a few hours a week, buying “special” products, or taking a weekend seminar.  We’re told our path to greatness and having everything we want in life can be had almost overnight. 

We know in our hearts that success is not achieved this way.  Success takes time.  When we get away from all the marketing hype, we realize that sustained success comes to those who love what they do, feel that their work matters, and are committed to becoming experts in their field.  During good times and bad times we should invest in what is meaningful and long-lasting.

Stephen King has sold more than 300 million books.  One of his books, On Writing, is about the craft of writing and his journey as a writer.  His success is not a get rich quick story.  King wrote, “By the time I was fourteen (and shaving twice a week whether I needed to or not) the nail in my wall would no longer support the weight of the rejection slips impaled upon it.   I replaced the nail with a spike and went on writing.”

The next time you’re being seduced by a “short-cut to success” message, think of Stephen King’s journey to 300 million books. 

Rocket science and your plans

When we give up believing there’s an overnight path to success, we’re faced with the reality that achieving our dreams will require significant effort.  And if we’re just getting started, things can look complicated:  there’s so much to learn and do.  This was the challenge I experienced when I decided to form my own publishing business.  I’m a newspaper columnist and speaker; I know very little about book publishing:  printing, distribution, promotion, logistics, sales, and fulfillment.  Everything I needed to do felt overwhelming.  (And if you read the news, book publishing is a business in peril.) 

And then, I got lucky.  I had longstanding plans to take my family to NASA’s Kennedy Space Center; the trip helped me put everything back in perspective.  We took every tour and we visited every exhibit.  We walked inside a retired space shuttle.  We watched the assembly of components for the International Space Station.  We saw one of the original rockets that took astronauts to the moon.  We took a picture of the lunar rover. 

On one of the tours I learned that it took over 400,000 people working together to get the first astronauts to the moon.  400,000 people!  That’s a lot of rocket scientists.  When I heard that, I immediately thought of my publishing effort; it just wasn’t that complicated after all.  It would require a lot of work, but I could do it.  I could succeed on my mission without requiring rocket scientists. 

Ask yourself if your plan requires rocket scientists.

Our perspective

Life is full of challenges, especially during this down economy.  But, more than ever we must keep our perspective.  We must focus on what matters. 

Maybe it’s time for us to have the persistence of Stephen King, and the inspiration of NASA’s rocket scientists.   

Copyright 2009 David J. Pollay

Invite your family and friends to join you

If you want your family, friends, and colleagues to join us on our Monday Morning Momentum™ journey, send this post along to them. 

Have a great week! 

Best to you,

David

---------------------------------------------------------

Sign up

And remember you can sign up for my newsletter, Momentum Minutes™, right here.

---------------------------------------------------------

David J. Pollay is the creator of The Law of the Garbage Truck™.  He is a syndicated columnist with the North Star Writers Group, creator and host of The Happiness Answer™ television program, and an internationally sought after speaker.  David’s book, Beware of Garbage Trucks!™, is due out this summer. 

David is the founder and president of the consulting and seminar organization, The Momentum Project.  He is also a founding associate executive director of the International Positive Psychology Association (IPPA).  If you want to reprint one of David’s columns, email [email protected].  Here’s David’s full bio.